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Wedding Party Etiquette & Duties

Maid/Matron of Honor (MOH)

Pre-wedding

•  Understand you’ve made a commitment financially and with your time

•  Be a calm and helpful force

•  Help shop for dresses (bride and bridesmaid)

•  Purchase MOH gown in timely manner

•  Lead bridesmaids; make sure they ordered their dresses & direct them through their duties

•  Plan and host the bachelorette party and wedding shower with bridesmaids

•  Keep track of gifts given and from whom for thank you cards

•  Attend all pre-wedding parties (rehearsals, etc.)

•  Be available for vendor appointments if you can

•  Offer to help with tasks such as addressing and stamping invites

•  Spread the news where the bride and groom are registered

Juliana Patrick Photography

Juliana Patrick Photography

Wedding Day

•  Be dressed before bride so you can assist her in getting ready

•  Keep track of bridesmaids and carry emergency kit

•  Hold her bouquet during the ceremony and readjust her train and veil when necessary; bustle dress between photos and reception

•  Hold the groom’s ring during ceremony (safest place – thumb)

•  Be a legal witness and sign the marriage license

•  Stand in the receiving line if they are having one and direct guests toward the guest book

•  Help get groups together for photography session

•  Make sure the bride eats and goes to the restroom (before and during reception)

•  Play hostess with other bridesmaids (direct guests to restrooms, gift area, seats, etc.)

•  Clean up after reception (items that go back to the couple)

•  Organize gifts and transport gifts to couple’s house

•  Take gown back to house or for preservation

•  Toast the couple after the best man (optional)

•  Attend post-wedding breakfast/brunch if they are having one

Bridesmaids

Mint Photography

Mint Photography

Pre-wedding

•  Understand you’ve made a commitment financially and with your time

•  Help MOH plan and hostess the bachelorette party and wedding shower

•  Purchase and get bridesmaid dress and shoes in a timely manner (be gracious about the dress choice even if it’s not your style)

•  Collaborate with bride on accessories

•  Attend rehearsal dinner

Wedding Day

•  Run last minute errands

•  Help decorate and setup where necessary

•  Be dressed before bride so you can assist her in getting ready

•  Assist MOH where necessary: photo session, hostess duties for guests, cleaning, etc.

•  Keep calm and the bride laughing (she doesn’t need to see problems that arise – try and solve it or find someone that can)

Best Man

Pre-wedding

•  Understand you’ve made a commitment financially and with your time

•  Help best man plan and host the bachelor party

•  Purchase/rent tux and shoes in a timely manner

•  Assist best man where necessary

•  Attend rehearsal dinner

Wedding Day

•  Run last minute errands

•  Help decorate and setup where necessary

•  Usher people to seats

•  Assist best man where necessary: photography session, host duties for guests, clean up, etc.

•  Keep calm and the groom laughing (he doesn’t need to see problems that arise – try and solve it or find someone that can)

Mother of the Bride

•  Help the bride find the dress of her dreams

•  If you haven’t met the groom’s parents, arrange for a meet and greet

•  Choose your wedding attire and let the groom’s mother know (find out if the bride cares if it compliments her wedding colors or not)

•  Discuss the budget and what you will pay for

•  Draw up initial “wish list” of bride family guests before it is narrowed down to fit budget

•  Act as hostess during reception

•  Attend all pre-wedding parties (bachelorette is optional – discuss with bride)

•  Receive instructions for photography sessions

•  Depending on family dynamics, possibly escort bride down aisle

Father of the Bride

•  Discuss the budget with the bride and what you will pay for

•  Attend the bachelor party (optional – discuss with groom)

•  Attend wedding rehearsal and dinner

•  Escort bride down the aisle

•  Receive instructions for photography sessions

•  Act as host during reception

•  If there is a father/daughter dance, help chose a song and dance with bride

Mother of the Groom

•  Draw up initial “wish list” of groom family guests before it is narrowed down to fit budget

•  Choose your wedding attire (find out bride’s mother’s attire and if the bride cares if your dress compliments the wedding colors or not)

•  Discuss the budget and what you will pay for

•  Plan and host rehearsal dinner

•  Attend wedding rehearsal

•  Attend all pre-wedding parties (bachelorette is optional – discuss with bride)

•  Receive instructions for photography sessions

•  If there is a mother/son dance, help chose a song and dance with son

Father of the Groom

•  Discuss the budget with the groom and what you will pay for

•  Attend the bachelor party (optional – discuss with groom)

•  Plan and host rehearsal dinner (be sure to do a toast or welcome speech)

•  Attend wedding rehearsal

•  Receive instructions for photography sessions

Step Parents

This is a personal choice that doesn’t fit into any general form of etiquette. Whatever you choose to do, it’s important to come from a position of respect, rather than favoritism. If you are having a difficult time deciding on how to proceed, it is good to discuss it with your parents prior to the wedding. Things that other couples have done include:

•  Bride and groom have their own sweetheart table and each set of parents host their own table at the reception

•  Bride has both fathers walk her down the aisle or begins walking with her father and is handed off to her stepfather

•  Stepfather walks mother of bride down the aisle

•  Bride begins dancing with father and is handed off to step-father during dance

• If stepfather has paid for the wedding, than he should act as host at the reception (which includes being the first to toast)

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